June 22, 2011
Talking to myself
Get over him. He's not even worth it. He is not worth your time of your tears. Yeah you loved him, I know that. And I know you just can't see yourself with anyone other than him, I get that. I've been there. But why should you spend all your time sitting at home, bawling your eyes out and wondering where he is and who he is with. Do you honestly think he is thinking about you? No. Sure it hurts, the fact that he is out there falling in and out of love with other girls. Yeah your gonna see him with one of his new girlfriends. Prepare yourself, cause straight up; it's gonna hurt. He will hold her a little closer and squeeze her hand a little tighter just because he knows your watching. He know it's killing you; that's why he will do it. Don't let him get to you because that, well that's exactly what he wants. Don't give him what he wants. He doesn't even deserve it. So what if he doesn't talk to you; do you honestly wanna be friends with an asshole like him anyways?! Thing is I know you still do. But give it time. Because all he would do is talk about his new girlfriend and just try and make you jealous. Do you really wanna hear that? No. Screw him and his girlfriend. He will be sorry. Trust me. When he finally sees you with some other guy who's not him. With that huge grin on your face and your boyfriend holding you close, he will realize how happy you are now. And how happy your boyfriend is because he has you; the girl of his dream. He will realize huge mistake he mad when he let you go, when he decided to choose her over you. When he decided he just did not love you the same. Trust me, he will be sorry. And don't you sit there thinking he won't be sorry I know you are. But I guarantee you now; He will be sorry. So don't go on spending your nights waiting for that one phone call you know your never gonna get. Or that IM you know he will never send you simply because he likes to ignore you. He like to pretend he does not see you online, he does it out of spite just because he knows it's killing you. When he walks past you in the hallways he is gonna look past you, but you need to know he will do that cause he knows somewhere inside you, it will hurt. I'm not gonna lie to you. It will hurt. It'll hurt a lot. But it will hurt even more when you see her name and how much he loves her in his profile. It's all gonna hurt. Knowing you're not the girl that's making him smile. Knowing your not the first person he thinks of when he wakes up and the last before he goes to sleep. Knowing your not the face on his background of his phone anymore. Knowing of he hasn't already he will delete the album of pictures of you he has on his laptop. Knowing you wont be spending every single moment possible with him. Knowing there's not gonna be no more late night phone calls arguing about who loves who the most. And you know what, today, tomorrow, next weeks, month from now; your phone will go off with a text message, you will instantly grab your phone, hoping it's him saying he wants to give your relationship another shot. But trust me; he's got to much pride. Even he want to be back with you, he wouldn't tell you. Your soon gonna realize he doesn't care about you anymore and he won't be the first person you call when your upset. He won't be the one to put that smile back on your face. And yeah! It's gonna hurt; it's gonna hurt a lot. But you know what you gonna do? Your gonna hold your head up. Your gonna show him your better than him and you don't need him in your life. Your gonna prove to him that he made the biggest mistake of his life letting you go and that you never really needed him anyways.